45. shitty song

Posted on February 14, 2013 by

Take the poor mans hand
Set his feet on dry land
Tell him to take a stand.
Before too long
Long after this shitty song,
He may win a gong
For his part in the masterplan.
He may become your biggest fan.
And may arise a brand new clan.
A brand new breed from his sick seed
Amassed from your good deed.
So take the lead;
Take a forward step, a promise told
Should be a promise kept.
i thought long & hard, while i slept:
If you give a drunk some change,
Do you think he will?
If you gave the man a chance,
Would he be drinking still?
If you gave the same man a job
Would he learn new skills?
Inebriated and inept
i abated and i slept.

About EightLeggedGemini

i love writing until i pick up a pen or keyboard, then i hate it. but over the years i've slowly scribbled my thoughts on receipts, bills, anything at hand; just to make these insistent thoughts go away.
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2 Responses to 45. shitty song

  1. Mike says:
    February 15, 2013 at 00:40

    A poetical monologue of scattered introspection with an effective raw phraseology. The hypotheses work very well as does the denouement. Very well done.

    Reply
  2. apatheticpoet says:
    February 15, 2013 at 01:11

    thank you, this is another of my oldies :)
    phraseology is a powerful thing for me, especially if it rhymes (see A Dog Day or The Saint),
    i think the drunk that i referred to is a random stranger, helps to keep me humble,
    for my own part, i drink to be social, if i have to,
    otherwise i prefer a more natural product :) hence introspection
    Thanks again for the deep critique, always valued :)

    Reply

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